Author: Kristine Binder

WHY

Kristine Binder
Some of you have asked about when and WHY I am running the Chicago Marathon. God has created all of us in his image. Some people are given very special gifts. It is up to us to learn more about these gifts to gain a deeper understanding, as well as appreciation, for these gifts. It is my goal to teach students about their own special gifts and the gifts of others. It has been a wonderful journey and I hope sharing my journey will motivate and inspire students, as well as others.
 On October 13, 2013, I will lace up my shoes and run the Chicago Marathon. My training has been a long, difficult road but nothing compared to the road a parent of a child with special gifts walks each and every day. I am running this Marathon for many reasons. I am running to raise awareness of autism. I am running for every girl’s positive self image. I am running to honor my hero, Kelly Weaver, her daughter, Gillian Weaver, and all other children with special gifts, as well as all girls everywhere.  I am running for the Alexander Leigh Center for Autism and Girls On The Run.
I am running to raise awareness of autism. Did you know that one out of every 150 children born this year will be diagnosed with autism? Did you know more children will be diagnosed with autism this year than with AIDS, diabetes & cancer combined? Autism costs the nation 90 billion dollars per year and the cost of lifelong care can be reduced by 2/3 with early diagnosis and intervention. There is no medical detection or cure for autism.
I am running for every girl’s positive self image. Girls on the Run is a life-changing, experiential learning program for girls age eight to thirteen years old. The program combines training for a 3.1 mile running event with self-esteem enhancing, uplifting workouts. The goal of the program is to encourage positive emotional, social, mental, spiritual and physical development. Girls on the Run promotes  physical as well as emotional, mental and character development. The girls complete the program with a stronger sense of identity, a greater acceptance of themselves, a healthier body image and an understanding of what it means to be part of a team. As a coach for four seasons, I have seen the positive outcomes of this program. These girls inspire me! To learn more about Girls On The Run go to www.gotrchicago.org    Make a donation to Girls on the Run
I am running to honor my hero, Kelly Weaver, her daughter, Gillian Weaver, and all other children with special gifts. Thirteen year old Gillian Weaver is autistic. Gillian’s father, Kevin Weaver, passed away from an undiagnosed brain tumor when Gilly was very young.  Kelly, now a single mom, has opened a school for Gillian and other autistic children. The Alexander Leigh Center for Autism was founded by Dorie Hoevel and Kelly Weaver, who are both parents of children with autism. These two dedicated mothers have created a place where children can reach their full individual potential, in a caring and safe environment, a place where each child’s differences are what make them special. To learn more about the school, please visit their website  www.alexanderleighcenterforautism.com   Make a donation to ALCA
                                                                                                                               
I run for each of my own children, the children I teach, the children that face frustration of autism, the children who doubt themselves, all children who daily face challenges no matter how big or small. As some of you know, music is a large part of my life. Therefore, I have asked the students for their help as well. I have compiled a playlist of musical inspiration to keep me moving during my long runs and workouts. I want to be reminded of each and every reason I run. I have asked the students to each think of a favorite song to add to the playlist. The list is fabulous and diverse! If you have a song you think would be a good addition, email it to me!  
Last but not least, I would ask for your prayers.  I would ask that you pray the children of St. Paulof the Cross, as well as all other children, that they may grow in wisdom and understanding.  I would ask that you pray for The Alexander Leigh Center for Autism, that this school will continue to be a place where each child can reach their full potential. I ask that you pray for the young women who participate in Girls On The Run that they gain a strong sense of identity. I would ask that you pray for my children as well as the children I teach, that they may grow in wisdom and understanding.  I would ask that you pray for all runners and me on race day so that we finish safely. Finally, I would ask that you pray not only for children with special gifts, but their parents as well.  They all face challenges each and every day that many of us will never know nor understand.
Forward is a Pace. Peace

Providence

Kristine Binder

Webster’s defines Providence as:
1 a) often capitalized : divine guidance or care 
b) capitalized : God conceived as the power sustaining and guiding human destiny
2 : the quality or state of being provident
The Oxford Dictionary defines it as:
1. the protective care of God or of nature as a spiritual power:
they found their trust in divine providence to be a source of comfort
(Providence) God or nature as providing protective care:
I live out my life as Providence decrees 
2. timely preparation for future eventualities:
it was considered a duty to encourage providence
Who would think that Providence would guide my life. I went for a run today and got lost in thought. My thoughts turned to Providence and I am not sure why…
I am only beginning to realize the role that providence has played in my life. I like the definition of “divine guidance or care” as well as the “protective care of God.” It is my belief that God has a plan for me. I may not always like it, accept it, or understand it but I know that there is a divine purpose behind the events of my life. I look for the lessons in relationships and events but don’t always ‘get the message’ and often times misunderstand the message.

 People tell me all the time I should do more and be more. I believe I am right where I belong,  doing right what I should be doing. I believe in Providence.  It never really made sense until this year.

In May, I decided to go to my college reunion for the first time in 25 years. When I was in high school making the decision to go to college was a huge one.  I went to visit the Woods just so they would stop calling me.  It was not even on my top 10 list but we went to visit anyway.    The moment we drove onto the campus I knew that I was in the right place.  I could feel it deep in my bones. At the time, I did not realize how that moment would impact my life forever.
The four years that I spent at St. Mary of the Woods changed me and marked me forever. Going back 25 years later and walking the campus took me back to a place and a peace I haven’t felt in a long time. I was filled with an overwhelming sense of spirit. As I walked the campus and visited places I had long forgotten, I was flooded with memories and feelings that I have not had a long time.  I did not realize how the women of the Woods would change and shape me into the woman I am today. It is truly Providence.
People and family questioned my decision to attend the Woods… “Why don’t you go to a Big Ten school?” they asked.  “Don’t you want a bigger school?” they asked.  But I was confident in my decision. I made mistakes while I was at the Woods.  I had success while I was at the Woods.   Most importantly,  I grew. I grew as a woman and as a person. I found the most important thing ….which was me. Providence drove me there. Walking the campus after 25 years and looking in the review mirror of life, I realized it was not only Providence but Mother Theodore Guerin’s hand guiding me all along. She had waited for me to come and follow her lead. She longed for me to trust her and to trust God. 

People have questioned decisions I’ve made my whole life. Why did you choose that college?  Why do you want to be a teacher? Why don’t you become an administrator? Don’t you want more? Why don’t you work where you can earn more money? Are you sure it’s right for you? Are you sure you want another child? Are you sure that’s the right house for your family. Questions and doubts. But I never doubted.  I have I’ve always had faith that Providence put me where I belong for a reason. The most important lessons I learned at the Woods were faith and trust… even though I didn’t know it at the time. Faith and trust were cornerstone of my time at the Woods.   The teachers there taught me to be the woman I am today. They never once pushed or forced but they guided. They saw in me something that I didn’t, couldn’t and wouldn’t see in myself. They did all they could to just guide me to find myself all on my own.  Those educators never pushed too hard. They always walked step by step with me. We were on a journey together. Their job was just to inspire me and guide me in the right direction to find that hidden treasure which was myself. They needed to show me that I could trust myself and that I needed to have faith in myself. They were sharing  Providence.  They were sharing the message of Mother Theodore. 
What I have realized over the years is that this is the foundation of who I am as a wife, parent, friend, teacher, coach and human being. I want each person I come in contact with to have faith and trust in

themselves. I want them to see what I see…all the potential,  possibilities and the greatness they have inside. Mother Theodore, Momma Teddy, as she is affectionately known to Woodsies,  always saw the potential inside others. She had faith and she trusted in Providence.  I strive to follow her example as well as the example of the Woods Women.  I strive to help others to trust in themselves, in their faith and in Providence. Forward is a pace. Peace.

Saved

Kristine Binder

Miriam Webster defines saved as:

: to rescue or deliver from danger or harm

: to preserve or guard from injury, destruction, or loss

: maintain, preserve

I am not sure who saved who but I do know that my dogs have changed my life. I had dogs as a kid but they were never really MY dogs. They were family dogs. Dogs that were chosen for the family by others.

My first dog was Buddy. He was adopted from the Anti-Cruelty society of Chicago. I still remember walking past cages and cages of pups and older dogs never feeling that any one of them was the right dog until I walked into a small, rarely visited corner of the shelter only to lock eyes with a pup that would soon become my best fur-ever friend. Buddy came home with me later that week as my first child. We moved in  and I spent my time planning a wedding and training a dog. He was a great dog full of vim and vigor. He saved me from loneliness. He loved me and protected me. He kept me company, taught me things about myself, and helped me become a better mom. He really was (and I do call him this still) my first child. When my first daughter was born, he took to her as if it was his own, protective and gentle to a fault. I moved and had more kids but Buddy was always a constant. He loved each new home and each new child even more. I moved one last time and the stairs were too much for him. He was getting old and I would not admit that my pal was failing. After 11 years, the last moved proved too much for him. Within months, he deteriorated and soon could no longer walk. His last night, my oldest slept beside him as he whimpered and she cried. Making the decision to put him down was the most difficult, yet humane thing I have ever done. I took him alone and stayed with him until he took his last breath. I cried for weeks at the loss and still cry thinking about that day. I know he is healthy and eating as much meat as his belly can hold, watching over us.

Living without a dog was lonely and sad. I didn’t feel completely safe at home at night with just the kids. It began with a donation of Buddy’s favorite bed back to his shelter. What a mistake! The kids saw the dogs and began to beg for a new pal. So we began the search for a new fur-ever friend right then and there. We looked at all the dogs and in the last cage was a dog that looked like a smaller version of Buddy. I could feel His paw in this chance meeting. This dog’s name was Precious. I told the kids we had to wait. We had to look at other shelters. I told them if she was there the following week and we had not found another dog, we would bring her home. Well, after looking at many shelters/websites/meeting dogs, the following week, she came home with us. Her name didn’t fit her nor our family so the kids changed it to Wrigley. She was a high energy pup that needed constant exercise. I walked her and walked her hoping to lose a little baby weight. It didn’t work. She wanted to run so we started running 1/2 a lap around our local park. That lead to a whole lap and then a challenge from a friend to train for and run a 5k. Wrigley soon became my favorite running buddy and we ran, albeit slowly, as I trained. I finished that first race and we ran many more miles together as I trained for many more races over the years. She was really the one that began my running addiction. She saved me from myself and a sedentary life. This winter was a sad one for my running buddy and I as at the age of 8, The vet told us Wrigley had arthritis and could no longer run with me….it was just too painful for her. I see it and understand it but the sadness in her eyes each time I head out the door for a run is often too much to bear. She is still such a vital member of the family and now has a new job…big sister/mother figure to our newest fur-ever friend, Tank.

Tank was not a pup I was interested in adopting but one that the kids wanted.  I knew that the work of the pup would be mine which is why I was not interested. I was done with potty training and chewing and midnight walks. I had come to terms with running alone. I was not in the mood for the expense of another dog. But the family over ruled me. So this summer has been dedicated to training and exhausting a playful pup. He saved Wrigley and me from boredom this summer. Wrigley keeps him in line and teaches him the ways of the pack. I marvel at the bond that has formed between them and worry what will happen down the line as Wrigley continues to age. Tank challenges me more than is necessary most days but I feel Buddy’s paw and presence again. I know he is up there watching with those loving, playful eyes protecting me. As Tank grows by leaps and bounds every day, I am reminded of all that Buddy and Wrigley have taught me. I am reminded of the unconditional love that my fur-ever friends provide me. I am reminded that it is not us that saves or rescues our fur balls, but it is the fur balls the choose us…that love us…..that change us…..that rescue us….that save us.

Peace. Forward is a pace.

Miles

Kristine Binder

Sunday was the Chicago Women’s Half Marathon. I registered to run this a long time ago but now I
was no where near prepared. I needed something to motivate me to the finish so I asked my friends,  family and Facebook who would like a mile dedicated to them. The response was overwhelming!  Each mile was accounted for within minutes!

I wrote the miles and initials on my arm on race morning as a reminder of who and what and why I was running. It looked crazy but hey…I wear a tutu!  Crazy is who I am! We drove to the race site, prepped at the car and then walked to the start.

A bathroom stop then a large sign provided a place to meet other friends and take photos prior to race start. We soon lined up, listened to some speeches (some better/less frightening than others) and the National Anthem. Then the gun went off and we were on our way. I was excited to start and was running with a new friend. I wanted to have a good run but  knew right away I had started to fast. Now it was all about covering the miles and finishing.

Mile 1 – Newtown
One of the last things a women in our group did was kiss her son. This was her first half and she was unsure if she would see him before the start. I was reminded of all the parents who would never have this opportunity again….or ever. I ran the mile feeling blessed with sassy, smart, independent kids who never fail to drive me crazy yet make me burst with pride every day.

Mile 2 – LS/GS
Two of my favorite little girls. I love my god daughters.  They light up the any room they enter and the lives of many. This part of the course took me past the Lakefront. I thought about how much those 2 girls love the water. Some of the best times with them happen on a beach!
Mile 3 – ZK
My former student who still makes me proud every day. He was a handful back in 6th grade but has become a responsible young man who makes a difference. This part of the course took me past the Chicago Police Memorial which is fitting as Z’s dad was CPD.
Mile 4 – LME
A running mom pal of mine. She has just started training for a half marathon and espouses my mantra, Forward is a Pace. I wanted to prove that forward really is a pace and I could finish.
Mile 5 – C/K/E/S/J
My kids. Through is all…good and bad…I love them with all my heart. They are one of the main reasons I run. I want to live a long time to enjoy them and make them as crazy as they make me.
Mile 6 – GL
Another former student. She was one tough cookie…and so was this mile. I knew it was going to take all I had to get through it just like I got through to her.  With a little tough love and a lot of just plain love…she turned around and now makes my so very proud every day. She gives back and helps others every single day.
Mile 7 – ALA
Oh my…I was ready to throw in the towel at this point. I wanted to quit. I wanted to raise the white flag and get a ride back….I was done. Then I heard a voice. It was loud and Italian and was yelling at me. I yelled back and for a whole mile we argued  and she yelled in Italian …. hand gestures and all!  I knew then there was no fighting her…she won. There was no quitting. I had to keep going.
Mile 8  – CA
My cousin. She and I have recently reconnected and I love it. Her mom, my aunt, was always one of my favorites. Funny, as I ran, the Journey song, “Be Good to Yourself” came on. C’s mom took me to my first concert…JOURNEY. She got me my first concert tshirt and I thought I was so cool!  Memories flooded back and kept me moving….and smiling.
Mile 9 – SD
A running pal, firefighter, and cancer survivor. He is an amazing guy and great dad. Prayer is a large part of his life and so I prayed….for many things, mostly to finish.
Mile 10 – DM
Another running buddy and truly amazing man. He is a rockstar role model for runners and for dads everywhere. He can make the best of the worst situations….with a joke and a smile. He is a great cheerleader for everyone…especially our running group members.
Mile 11 – CW/BD
This mile was for 2 people. One is the son of an old friend. He is another great dad and first responder. He goes towards trouble when others run away. Funny that it was during his mile that I passed the firefighter statue and there was a woman receiving medical assistance as well.
The other person I was running this mile for was an unborn baby. A baby that is already blessed by the  love of many. This is one lucky little child whose extended family will never let those little baby feet touch the ground! I finished the mile running past the Police Memorial. Baby D’s daddy is a cop and, like my own husband, knows too many names on that wall.
Mile 12 – DL
This mile was for an old teacher pal of mine. A man who loves his job, loves teaching and loves music. He is a reminder of the passion of teaching and learning. He is always so supportive and a plethora of information, as well as prayers. I was honored to run this mile for his intentions.
Mile 13.1 – GOTR
This short part of the run was for my Girls on the Run and all Girls on the Run past present and future. I ran as fast as I could to finish…just like they do. I ran with all my heart…just like they do. I rejoiced at the finish….just like they do.
The Finish Line – KW

I crossed the line and heaved a deep sigh. This was for my dear friend and hero, K. She is one of the most dedicated, determined, hard working, faith filled, fabulous women I know. Life is never easy for her but she makes it look easy and handles everything with such grace that I wanted to channel all that as I … finally…crossed the finish line. I didn’t want anyone to know that I had struggled or doubted …I wanted to be strong…just like her.

This race was really NOT a race but more of an endurance event. It was so cathartic for me. I feel as though I sweat out all my doubts, worries and other bad ‘stuff’. I had to push through and deal with many emotions but I just kept moving forward…pushing through it all…to get to the other side. Forward was my pace and  I finished. Not fast. Not first. Not easy. But I finished….for all of you. Thank you for running the miles with me. Forward is a Pace. Peace.

Quit

Kristine Binder

Some days running gets the best of me. Last weekend I ran a very HOT half marathon. It was miserable. It was hot. I was unhappy. I was angry. It was my slowest time ever but I finished. I pushed through it all and finished. I didn’t think I wanted to run after that so I put it off every day…until yesterday. I ran 5.5 miles and it was again…miserable. I was hot and I was ready to quit. I wanted to quit running forever and burn my running shoes as well as clothing. I decided to give it one more shot and try today. If it was bad…I was done forever.

Well today I got the best of running. I took off and was unsure of myself but as I kept putting one foot in fron of the other I was moving faster and feeling better. I wanted to keep going but knew I had to stop as this was a training run and I have further to go tomorrow…I also didn’t want to tempt fate.

Its funny, just when you are ready to throw in the towel, you change your mind and use it to wipe the sweat off your face. Never quit…forward is a pace.