Tag: pride

Deserving

Kristine Binder

The world shifted on January 20, 2025. So much of what we once knew and relied on seems to have vanished. Countless people now feel unsafe in their own country, and those who love them are grappling with helplessness.
I wish I could offer something profound or inspirational, but I don’t have all the answers. I’m not here to lead the way. I’m here to sit in this moment—in all its messiness—right alongside you. I’ll sit with these feelings for a while longer, and then I’ll do what I do best: share kindness and love. I’ll rise to protect those I love and care for. I’ll fight for the vulnerable.
Everyone deserves to feel safe, loved, and valued—whether at home, in school, at work, or in their communities. No one should endure rejection, discrimination, or harm because of who they are, where they are from  or who they love. The attacks on LGBTQIA+ and immigrant communities are not just political; they are assaults on human dignity. They fracture families, friendships, and communities, and they serve no purpose but to spread division and pain.
To every transgender, queer, nonbinary, and marginalized individual: Your life MATTERS. You are seen. You are powerful. Your life has purpose and meaning. Walking in your truth is an act of courage and strength, and every step you take toward being your authentic self shows the resilience that lies within you. You are deserving of love, respect, and kindness. Your existence brings light and beauty to the world. Please remember that you are valued, you are enough, and you are deeply loved. The world is brighter and better because of you. 
I will continue to show up, speak up, and stand up for immigrant and vulnerable communities. Advocacy has always been a part of who I am, but now I’m stepping fully into that role with unwavering determination. We can feel everything—grief, fear, anger—but then we move forward. We count down the days of the next four years, yes, but let’s not forget that we can make a difference much sooner by taking action right now.
Take the time you need to process your feelings. If you need a hug, a listening ear, or just someone to sit with you in the stillness, I’m here. But I won’t let you stay in that place too long. We have work to do.
I love you.
You matter.
You belong.
Together, we rise, move forward, to create a better, kinder, more accepting world.

Peace,
#tutulady
#forwardisapace

Healing

Kristine Binder

About yesterday….
Those that know me know that delegation is NOT my strong suit!  I like to just do it all myself…. but yesterday I stepped outside my comfort zone and delegated. What a liberating experience!  My other Mama Bears stepped up in grand style showing up with a tent, table, snacks, water and HUGS!  
This is our second year participating in this event and it was a joy once again! I saw people wearing all sorts of shirts and some of my favorites were,   “I love my gay child,” “Proud Mom” “Proud Dad” and “Will Trade Racists for Refugees” !
And I hugged….one armed!  Boy did I hug! 
And I listened. 
I listened as one of my favorite Queens read a beautiful story to children titled, “Families, Families, Families” while children interacted with the story in the sweetest way, sharing what their families look like.  I listened as a woman told me how she recently moved her family from California to Evanston in order to continue safe healthcare and an affirming community for her children. I listened to a  woman share that she was learning to ask how to use correct pronouns. I listened to a mom share how she was learning to love the adult child in front of her and grieve her own losses. I listened to a man who had gotten engaged in the past year and was planning the wedding of his dreams all while preparing for the longevity of marriage by going to couples therapy with his partner. I listened to a young woman tell me that she attends family events alone as her partner is not welcome and her family does not acknowledge her partner. I listened to a man tell me that his own father got a hug from a Free Dad Hugger last year and it seemed to open his heart a bit to his son. 
And I learned….I learned from one of my Mamas that the word of the day was “Bashert.” Bashert is a Yiddish word that means ‘destined’ or ‘meant to be.’  I felt that deep in my bones yesterday with each and every interaction. 
And it did not stop once we cleaned up to go home. I stopped at the store on my way home, yes….in my tutu and FMH shirt! I was stopped by 2 older (80’s) ladies in the parking lot….At first I was a bit apprehensive after my recent encounter at a local fast food establishment, but I stopped to talk to them. They told me they loved my outfit and thanked me for giving hugs. They were  both banished (their word, not mine) from their families when the families found out they were in love and more than just friends. They have been together over 50 years and created their own family of people that love and accepte them. I hugged them both together for a long time….and they were so gentle and caring. I did not let go until they did and when we stepped apart….all of us were crying…in the parking lot of the grocery store!  What a sight! I watched as they walked away with their arms around each other and thought how lucky they were to have found such love in one another. 
Another moment of beshert…..and another reminder of why hugs (and tutus) are so important. 
Love….and hugs….heal. 
Peace
#tutulady
#forwardisapace

Pride

Kristine Binder

Seven years ago I took my son to his first Pride Parade. It was my first in a LONG time so we were both a bit nervous. A core memory was created for both of us that day.
This year we were together again, but not as spectators. We walked together for Free Mom Hugs giving hugs throughout the parade route. Watching my son, his boyfriend, my daughter, their friends give hugs and spread love created another core memory. The sheer joy and emotion of the day is something that I will never forget. My son has gone from an unsure young boy to a confident gay man in the blink of an eye. It has not always been an easy journey for either one of us. Along the way he has shown me what fearlessness looks like, as well as grace and tough love when needed. And, most importantly, he has taught me what it means to be an LQBTQIA+ parent and active ally. He is my superhero. Being an ally is not always fun, nor is it easy, however, he has helped me to understand that it is so worth it!
Representing Free Mom Hugs in the Pride Parade is an opportunity to give hugs to those who need them most. It is an opportunity to bear witness to those who need love and acceptance as they may not experience those things at home. So for over 3 miles, Free Mom Hugs walked into the outstretched arms of those who needed a mom/dad/brother/sister/ally hug. We listened as people told us their story. We hugged as people cried. We loved as people shared. We affirmed as people needed support.
I am always amazed at the sheer number of people who do not feel affirmed for who they are and how they love. It is why I continue to be an ally and a safe space at home, at school and in the world.
That journey all started long ago….with a boy and a cape. My superhero.
Peace.
#tutulady
#forwardisapace

Parade

Kristine Binder

I struggle to find the right words as I am overwhelmed with emotion.
I began the day with high anxiety but as the morning wore on and my group grew, the “mom” energy was high!Our group may not have been the largest but we were the most energetic and impactful.
The hugging started before the parade began. A young woman came and asked for a hug. It was tight and it was long. There were tears….. and that was just the beginning.
Once the parade began, we were ready…. Arms wide open!
“I need a hug!”
“I want a mom hug!”
“Can I have a dad hug?” (We had several dads with us too!!)
Some people just opened their arms and waited for us!
For four miles, we high fived, waved and hugged. There were many times I had to run to catch up because the hugs were long…I don’t let go of a hug until they do! I tell each person I hug that they are loved and they matter.
I lost count of the hugs that ended with tears.
I heard more than once as I walked away, “that’s amazing” “what a wonderful group” “she gives great hugs!
Just when I thought it could go on forever, we were at the end of the parade route.
Our group sat together in the shade, relishing in the endorphin rush, recounting stories of epic hugs and soon we went our separate ways.
What I didn’t realize is that my job was not yet done.
As I walked back to my car I was stopped on a corner by an older man. He asked if I believed in fate and I said yes. He told me that he had seen me in the parade but couldn’t get to the rail and he really needed a hug. As we hugged he told me his mom never accepted him and she had just passed …. But now that she was gone, he wished he could have hugged her one last time. So …. I was her stand in.
I continued my walk and ran into a young guy I hugged during the parade. He said our group was the best of the parade and what he will always remember.
The last hug is one I will remember a long time. A young woman walked past me at the el. She made eye contact with me as she passed. A few minutes later she had returned and was at my side.
“Do you really give hugs?”
“Yup. Want a mom hug!”
“Oh my god! Really?! You have no idea how much a need a mom hug today…”
So we hugged a long time. She pulled away suddenly, said thanks through tears and walked away as fast as she appeared. I stood there in the middle of the sidewalk stunned. Not sure why she needed that hug so bad but I’m glad I was there.
Today was one I will remember for a long time. One that I will look back on fondly. One that will be a constant reminder of the need we all have to feel loved. One that reinforced, once again, the power of a hug.
Peace.
#tutulady
#forwardisapace

Ally

Kristine Binder

About last night….
I was invited to represent Free Mom Hugs on a panel,  Allies for Equality, at Grant Thornton in Chicago. I have never done something like this and the corporate world is a foreign concept to me but I stepped outside my comfort zone.
I spoke to the need for us all to listen, make mistakes and be vulnerable in our journeys as allies. I spoke to the need for us all to create safe spaces for all to experience kindness, feel seen and just breathe. I spoke of the power of a simple (and not so simple) hug.
Before and after the panel I listened….I listened as people shared their stories with both my son and me. Yes, my son accompanied me on this adventure. He is one of the main reasons I began this journey with Free Mom Hugs.
One man came up and said, “I love you and love everything you said but have to share what will stick with me…..I looked over at your son as you were speaking and saw him taking your picture. His face was so tender……”
I smiled and blushed, “It is usually me that is taking the photos of him….”
Later that same man came up to both my son and I and said, “I told your mom that what I will remember is the moment I saw you taking her picture…it was so sweet…”
“She is always the one taking my picture so it was my turn now…”
My son and I stayed, hugging everyone more than once…it was as if we could not hug them enough. When we finally left and walked to the car I was emotionally and physically spent…but in the best way possible.
Remember Ally is a verb NOT a noun, always be kind and NEVER underestimate the power of a hug.
Peace
#tutulady
#forwardisapace