I am a planner. I like things in order. I like to know what is going to happen next. My life….and God…well they have other plans for me. Life and God like to throw me curveballs. They like to keep me on my toes.
After parent teacher conferences Thursday, our admin told us that our professional development day for Friday had been canceled. We were all to enjoy a day off! My initial reactions was YEA! Day off! Then my anxiety brain took over….What am I going to do? What needs to get done? I did not make plans or appointments. I do not have a list of things to do. ACK!
So I took a deep breath and decided to embrace the unexpected. This is not something I am comfortable with at all. I told myself that I was doing nothing that did not make me happy on Friday.
I woke up with nothing planned…..it was the strangest feeling. I got dressed to run, took the kids to the train and had some coffee. I had decided to go for a run and maybe some yoga.
I have not run nor gone to yoga in months. I have been a lump. I have made excuses. Today was no different. I was making excuses….and needed to be stronger than my best excuse.
My run was not easy. Matter of fact it was downright difficult. I pushed through just over 4 miles! Longest run in a long time!
I was feeling so good! Mid Morning hot yoga class was calling my name and when I saw my favorite teacher, I knew I was in the right spot….those unexpected curballs from God and Life…..I was hitting them out of the park today!
Yoga meditation was about Santosha – contentment. to practice being in the moment. to remain grounded. turning into yourself. digging down into your inner peace. It was EXACTLY what I needed…that and a good sweat!
I have not been this good to myself in a long while. I have not practiced self care like I preach to others. Today I was forced by ME…to take time for ME. I forgot that I am important. I forgot so many things….
I forgot that my dog needs his harness to run with me but remembered he loves and needs to run with me.
I forgot my running route and got lost but remembered that I always find my way home.
I forgot that the hardest part of any run is getting out the door but remembered that once I get started I could run forever.
I forgot how diverse my playlists are but remembered that I love all kinds of music and have passed that to my kids.
I forgot how hard it is to outrun the voices in my head but remembered that those voices are not endurance athletes like me.
I forgot that I am willing to fail but remembered that I am determined to rise.
I forgot that breathing is important in running and yoga but remembered that some days inhaling and exhaling is enough.
I forgot that I sweat a lot during yoga but remembered that I need to get rid of the toxins in my body.
I forgot that I lose my balance and sometimes fall down in yoga and life but remembered that I always get back up and regain my balance.
I forgot that one side of my body is stronger than that other but remembered that I can work to make them more equal.
I forgot that some yoga poses are difficult but I remembered that I am flexible.
I forgot that I am easily frustrated but remembered that I can breathe through the frustration.
I forgot that running clears my head but I remembered that I work through my problems when I run.
I forgot that I feel more at peace after I run or do yoga but remembered that I need to make them more of a priority.
I forgot that I need some me time but remembered I need to work on self care making it a priority.
I forgot that pace only matters to me but remembered that forward is my pace.