Blog

Sunday was the Chicago Women’s Half Marathon. I registered to run this a long time ago but now I
was no where near prepared. I needed something to motivate me to the finish so I asked my friends,  family and Facebook who would like a mile dedicated to them. The response was overwhelming!  Each mile was accounted for within minutes!

I wrote the miles and initials on my arm on race morning as a reminder of who and what and why I was running. It looked crazy but hey…I wear a tutu!  Crazy is who I am! We drove to the race site, prepped at the car and then walked to the start.

A bathroom stop then a large sign provided a place to meet other friends and take photos prior to race start. We soon lined up, listened to some speeches (some better/less frightening than others) and the National Anthem. Then the gun went off and we were on our way. I was excited to start and was running with a new friend. I wanted to have a good run but  knew right away I had started to fast. Now it was all about covering the miles and finishing.

Mile 1 – Newtown
One of the last things a women in our group did was kiss her son. This was her first half and she was unsure if she would see him before the start. I was reminded of all the parents who would never have this opportunity again….or ever. I ran the mile feeling blessed with sassy, smart, independent kids who never fail to drive me crazy yet make me burst with pride every day.

Mile 2 – LS/GS
Two of my favorite little girls. I love my god daughters.  They light up the any room they enter and the lives of many. This part of the course took me past the Lakefront. I thought about how much those 2 girls love the water. Some of the best times with them happen on a beach!
Mile 3 – ZK
My former student who still makes me proud every day. He was a handful back in 6th grade but has become a responsible young man who makes a difference. This part of the course took me past the Chicago Police Memorial which is fitting as Z’s dad was CPD.
Mile 4 – LME
A running mom pal of mine. She has just started training for a half marathon and espouses my mantra, Forward is a Pace. I wanted to prove that forward really is a pace and I could finish.
Mile 5 – C/K/E/S/J
My kids. Through is all…good and bad…I love them with all my heart. They are one of the main reasons I run. I want to live a long time to enjoy them and make them as crazy as they make me.
Mile 6 – GL
Another former student. She was one tough cookie…and so was this mile. I knew it was going to take all I had to get through it just like I got through to her.  With a little tough love and a lot of just plain love…she turned around and now makes my so very proud every day. She gives back and helps others every single day.
Mile 7 – ALA
Oh my…I was ready to throw in the towel at this point. I wanted to quit. I wanted to raise the white flag and get a ride back….I was done. Then I heard a voice. It was loud and Italian and was yelling at me. I yelled back and for a whole mile we argued  and she yelled in Italian …. hand gestures and all!  I knew then there was no fighting her…she won. There was no quitting. I had to keep going.
Mile 8  – CA
My cousin. She and I have recently reconnected and I love it. Her mom, my aunt, was always one of my favorites. Funny, as I ran, the Journey song, “Be Good to Yourself” came on. C’s mom took me to my first concert…JOURNEY. She got me my first concert tshirt and I thought I was so cool!  Memories flooded back and kept me moving….and smiling.
Mile 9 – SD
A running pal, firefighter, and cancer survivor. He is an amazing guy and great dad. Prayer is a large part of his life and so I prayed….for many things, mostly to finish.
Mile 10 – DM
Another running buddy and truly amazing man. He is a rockstar role model for runners and for dads everywhere. He can make the best of the worst situations….with a joke and a smile. He is a great cheerleader for everyone…especially our running group members.
Mile 11 – CW/BD
This mile was for 2 people. One is the son of an old friend. He is another great dad and first responder. He goes towards trouble when others run away. Funny that it was during his mile that I passed the firefighter statue and there was a woman receiving medical assistance as well.
The other person I was running this mile for was an unborn baby. A baby that is already blessed by the  love of many. This is one lucky little child whose extended family will never let those little baby feet touch the ground! I finished the mile running past the Police Memorial. Baby D’s daddy is a cop and, like my own husband, knows too many names on that wall.
Mile 12 – DL
This mile was for an old teacher pal of mine. A man who loves his job, loves teaching and loves music. He is a reminder of the passion of teaching and learning. He is always so supportive and a plethora of information, as well as prayers. I was honored to run this mile for his intentions.
Mile 13.1 – GOTR
This short part of the run was for my Girls on the Run and all Girls on the Run past present and future. I ran as fast as I could to finish…just like they do. I ran with all my heart…just like they do. I rejoiced at the finish….just like they do.
The Finish Line – KW

I crossed the line and heaved a deep sigh. This was for my dear friend and hero, K. She is one of the most dedicated, determined, hard working, faith filled, fabulous women I know. Life is never easy for her but she makes it look easy and handles everything with such grace that I wanted to channel all that as I … finally…crossed the finish line. I didn’t want anyone to know that I had struggled or doubted …I wanted to be strong…just like her.

This race was really NOT a race but more of an endurance event. It was so cathartic for me. I feel as though I sweat out all my doubts, worries and other bad ‘stuff’. I had to push through and deal with many emotions but I just kept moving forward…pushing through it all…to get to the other side. Forward was my pace and  I finished. Not fast. Not first. Not easy. But I finished….for all of you. Thank you for running the miles with me. Forward is a Pace. Peace.

Some days running gets the best of me. Last weekend I ran a very HOT half marathon. It was miserable. It was hot. I was unhappy. I was angry. It was my slowest time ever but I finished. I pushed through it all and finished. I didn’t think I wanted to run after that so I put it off every day…until yesterday. I ran 5.5 miles and it was again…miserable. I was hot and I was ready to quit. I wanted to quit running forever and burn my running shoes as well as clothing. I decided to give it one more shot and try today. If it was bad…I was done forever.

Well today I got the best of running. I took off and was unsure of myself but as I kept putting one foot in fron of the other I was moving faster and feeling better. I wanted to keep going but knew I had to stop as this was a training run and I have further to go tomorrow…I also didn’t want to tempt fate.

Its funny, just when you are ready to throw in the towel, you change your mind and use it to wipe the sweat off your face. Never quit…forward is a pace.

So today I took off for a short run just to get in the miles. It was warm and I was not in the mood. I needed to get in my weekly miles now that training season has begun so I filled up a water bottle, laced up my shoes and headed out the door.

I started slow and my pace was way off. I knew I had to pick it up or head home. So I chose to pick it up. Heck… It was only 3 miles! I ran my usual route and before I knew it, I was into my happy pace.

At mile 2 I was heading down the street and saw I man I see often. I have written about him before. He was heading west and I was heading south. I called out, “hey..there’s my hero!”

He turned, looked at me and smiled wide, “Hey, young lady!”

“I am so sorry. I see you all the time and have even talked to you at Happy Foods before but I don’t know your name.”

“Kenny” he answered.

“Kenny, I see you all the time and think that if you are out doing your thing here I can do what I have to do too.”

“Listen, you snooze…you lose. And I am no loser. I am not losing my ability to walk or my life.”

“Hey, forward is a pace is my motto.”

“You got dat right, young lady. What is your name?” he responded his best Chicago accent.

“Kristine,” I responded.

“Nice to meet you, Kristine but I may still call you young lady!!.”

We chatted a bit more before we were off in our different directions. What you have to understand is that Kenny is a ’50 something’ that had a stroke a few years ago and was told he would not walk again. He is paralyzed no one side of his body and walks with a limp and a cane. I see him walking all over the neighborhood. He told me he tries to walk for at least an hour a day just so he retains the ability to move. He is my hero and inspiration.

I am honored and blessed with angels in my life. Angels that are constant reminders of the good things, the many blessings, in my life. Kenny is one of those Angels. Forward is a pace. Peace.

Posted with Blogsy

Bullies…they are everywhere. I have been the victim for much of my life and perhaps this is why I am who I am today. There are bullies I never confronted from my past and issues I have never dealt with that are all coming to the forefront now. Why now? Who knows. Everyone thinks of bullies as something kids deal with but there are plenty of adult bullies. I deal with those folks on a regular basis. Perhaps it is the bullies who made me into the person I am today. Perhaps I am who I am in spite of them. I am not sure but I think about it often like on a recent run.

Sunday I took off for what I thought was going to be an easy 5 mile run. I had not run in a week and was anxious to get out and hit the pavement. I had planned out my route in my head and took off. I felt as though I was at the starting line of a long awaited race …. this was the first real run of summer! I was soon lost in my thoughts and the music. Strangely enough when I got a little over a mile in, I found myself heading off my planned route and towards a trail I normally run with my group. I had not been to the trail in months. I realized my feet were in charge, not my head. But then I heard a voice in the distance….taunting me…teasing me. Every bully and every mean comment every directed at me started to flood into my head. I started to wonder where the voice was coming from. Was I crazy? Was it a person in a passing car?

I soon saw the trailhead and wondered if I should turn and head back home. But then I heard that voice again…the teasing and taunting…. So I headed onto the trail. I am not sure what possessed me but I started to get angry. As my feet pounded out the miles, the voice grew louder and my anger grew like a fire fed with gasoline.

I realized I was going faster than my normal pace and was struggling but the voice in my head was so loud now, I could not drowned it out. That is when I passed a sign on the trail that said, “Run through them like a Tank”. I smiled and kept going. The fire of anger continued to grow as I recognized the voice taunting me….it was Wanda! That brutal bridge on the path was the one that was causing me to doubt myself and my ability.

As I got closer, her voice grew louder. I paused at the base and took one last look….it was decision time…fight or flight. I took a deep breath and ran….head first, full steam ahead into Wanda as she teased me. “You can’t take me!” “You’ll give up!” “the top? You can’t get there without walking!” “You are fat and slow!” “You are not good enough to get to the top”….and on and on…. Until I realized that I was at the top. Without a word, I ran to the top and then caught my breath. As I stood there keeled over, hands on my knees huffing and puffing, I realized something. I realized that I have rarely confronted the bullies in my life. I just walk away and let things go. I turn and just ignore them and it just doesn’t ever end. The bully may go away but the words have stayed with me for a lifetime.

I caught my breath and continued on for a few miles before turning and heading back home. This was not a fast nor effortless run that turned out to be 8 miles but I needed it. I had to take on Wanda again on the return trip but this time she didn’t say too much, and what she did say was not all that loud. I know that there will be days where she rears her ugly Bully head again but I am more confident that I will be able handle her. I am more confident that I will be able to battle back the demons each time. Dealing with the bullies of the past and present will never be easy but I feel like I can stand a bit taller and remember the messages I teach my Girls on the Run. Be Strong. Be Confident. Be YOU. No matter what others think or say. Forward is a Pace. Peace.

Posted with Blogsy

I have to admit that I have been a total slacker in the running/working out department. I just have not had the time nor energy to do either and it is not a good thing. I see not only the intake of food (BAD food) increasing and the scale moving in the wrong direction. Last Monday I decided to go for a run mostly for my mental health but that was disastrous. 4 miles in the heat was more than my body and mind could handle. There was walking, tears and even throwing of various items (which I picked up…guilt got the better of me!).  All week I worried about my upcoming race and wondered what would happen once I pinned on my number. I was not ready…and I knew it.

Saturday’s race was the Soldier Field 10 miler. This is a race I have run before and really love. It is a great distance along a beautiful course and I finish on the 50 yard line of Soldier Field. What more could a girl ask for?!  Not much….or so I thought.

The TMI truck was full of my running girls as we took off early for Soldier Field. We parked in the garage, relaxed and waited in the warmth for a while. Eventually we all had to use the restroom and decided it was time to get ready to run. We headed out of the lot and into Soldier Field to take some pictures and go to the bathroom. I had some water and an AcelGel. I was trying something new this race…gel prior to running as opposed to just during the race. I was hoping and praying it would not lead to tummy issues! We waited inside and watched other runners until we could wait no more…it was time to find our corrals.

How it happened I am still not sure but as we walked we were herded into a faster corral than planned. Not to worry…we would be starting sooner thus…finishing sooner! We met some other runners we knew, chatted and waited for the gun to go off….and then we were off and running.

I am not a fan of the first part of the course. We run through the dark tunnel of McCormick Place. It is filled with bumps and holes and uneven pavement. I am always afraid I am going to fall thus I go more slowly in this area. It is scary to run in the dark! Once we exit the tunnel the course opens and we have a beautiful view of the lake and Lake Shore Drive.  About mile 4 I had some water and an orange AcelGel. I love that stuff!  We ran south until about mile 5 and then turned around and ran the Lake Front Path on the return. This is a much narrower part of the course but the the runners have thinned out and it is a tad bit easier to maneuver.  This is one of my favorite parts as I have the Lake on my right shoulder and the city in front of me. I was feeling good and running well at this point. I had lost my running buddies and, in hindsight, this was a good thing for all of us. We could each run our own race.

I was unsure what to expect as far as time goes for this race and was just hoping to finish. Meeting my PR seemed impossible with my lack of training so my goal was to have fun, run well and FINISH. Forward was my pace….I think I looked at my Garmin once but was so confused I gave up trying to figure it out.

At mile 7 there was water and a DJ. As I got closer I heard Francesca Batistelli’s song, “It’s Your Life”. This is my ringback on my phone and a sort of anthem for me. It is not a common song that people listen to…so I was shocked to hear it. As I ran up to the DJ I asked if this was his choice of music and he said yes!  I hugged him and told him thanks. One of my Sole Sisters has said that she thinks I need to hug at least one person during each race and I think she is right. I get so much from those moments! That song was just what I needed to hear at that moment. I was starting to doubt myself and my ability to finish. I was walking more now than running and I was tired.

I figured I had come this far and only had 3 miles to go…I had to finish. I could finish. Running around the back of McCormick place the crowds start to increase and the momentum really picks up. I was going to leave it all on the course today. I was not going down without a fight today. Leaving the path and heading onto the street then into the parking tunnel was just the motivation I needed. I knew I was almost there. I ran out of the tunnel and was tempted to stop and take a picture but changed my mind. I wanted the finish. I kicked in to high gear and raced towards the finish line and crossed it with a little twirl,  a curtsy and a huge smile.  I looked down at the Garmin and saw my time. It was faster than I thought but then again, I am still learning how to use it so I was not sure if it was right.

I caught my breath, took a few pics and soon my running buddies were by my side. We got some water and headed towards the BLING!!

We were surprised to find that this year, the 10th anniversary year of the race, that things were a tad bit different. This year the people

giving us our medals were active duty service members. As the young man put the medal around my neck and said, “Congratulations! You are amazing!” I started to cry. I was not amazing…he was.  I was no hero…he was. I didn’t deserve a medal…he did. It was a moment, and a young man,  I will not soon forget.

When we arrived home, I checked my time. I had PRed by 3 whole minutes!!  Not seconds…MINUTES!  WOW! What a shock and surprise. However, the PR paled in comparison to the moment that young man gave me my medal. I am forever grateful to him and others like him for their service to our country. I am forever grateful to those who have fought and died to protect all I hold dear. I am forever grateful to those who have more courage than I every day…they are the heroes  They deserve the medals.