Author: Kristine Binder

Grief

Kristine Binder

Grief is a strange, relentless companion. It comes in waves, some so powerful they knock me off my feet, while others gently lap at my ankles before receding into the background. Lately, though, the waves feel more like a storm. The world is so heavy right now, and I can feel that weight pressing down on my chest. Everywhere I turn, there seems to be another loss, another heartbreak, another reason to grieve.
Losing my dad has been a pain I can hardly describe. It’s not just the absence of his voice or his laugh—it’s the absence of his presence in my life, the anchor he provided, the memories we’ll never create. On top of that, dear friends of mine are mourning loved ones. A young person I cherished as if they were my own has left this world far too soon. Each loss feels like another stone added to the pile I carry, threatening to bury me.There are moments when it all feels so overwhelming that I want to crawl into bed, pull the covers over my head, and disappear. The thought of facing another day, carrying another burden, is sometimes too much to bear. But then there are other moments—moments when that grief fuels a fire in me to fight. To show up for my children, my students, my community. To prove that love and resilience can be louder than hate and despair.
Being my mother’s emergency contact now is a new weight I hadn’t prepared for. It’s a role that feels heavy with responsibility and the reminder of how fragile life is. Sometimes, the pressure of it all feels like it might crush me. But then I remember: forward is my pace. Even if it’s just baby steps, I keep moving. One foot in front of the other. One moment at a time.
Grief, I’ve learned, doesn’t go away. It shifts, it changes, and it continues to wash over me in unexpected moments. Some days, I feel like I’m barely keeping my head above water. Other days, I find glimmers of peace when the waves recede. But within those waves, I try to find the strength to swim. To reach out to others. To remind myself that while the world feels heavy, we don’t have to carry it alone.
Peace is not always easy to find, but it is there—waiting in the moments when the waves recede, offering us the chance to catch our breath. Let’s take those baby steps together, reminding ourselves that we don’t have to face it alone. In the moments when the storm calms, we can find breath, and maybe even hope, together.
If you’re reading this and you’re feeling the weight of your own grief, know that you’re not alone. Take those baby steps, no matter how small. Cry if you need to. Rest if you can. Fight when you’re ready. And remember: forward is always a pace.
Peace,
#tutulady
#forwardisapace

Deserving

Kristine Binder

The world shifted on January 20, 2025. So much of what we once knew and relied on seems to have vanished. Countless people now feel unsafe in their own country, and those who love them are grappling with helplessness.
I wish I could offer something profound or inspirational, but I don’t have all the answers. I’m not here to lead the way. I’m here to sit in this moment—in all its messiness—right alongside you. I’ll sit with these feelings for a while longer, and then I’ll do what I do best: share kindness and love. I’ll rise to protect those I love and care for. I’ll fight for the vulnerable.
Everyone deserves to feel safe, loved, and valued—whether at home, in school, at work, or in their communities. No one should endure rejection, discrimination, or harm because of who they are, where they are from  or who they love. The attacks on LGBTQIA+ and immigrant communities are not just political; they are assaults on human dignity. They fracture families, friendships, and communities, and they serve no purpose but to spread division and pain.
To every transgender, queer, nonbinary, and marginalized individual: Your life MATTERS. You are seen. You are powerful. Your life has purpose and meaning. Walking in your truth is an act of courage and strength, and every step you take toward being your authentic self shows the resilience that lies within you. You are deserving of love, respect, and kindness. Your existence brings light and beauty to the world. Please remember that you are valued, you are enough, and you are deeply loved. The world is brighter and better because of you. 
I will continue to show up, speak up, and stand up for immigrant and vulnerable communities. Advocacy has always been a part of who I am, but now I’m stepping fully into that role with unwavering determination. We can feel everything—grief, fear, anger—but then we move forward. We count down the days of the next four years, yes, but let’s not forget that we can make a difference much sooner by taking action right now.
Take the time you need to process your feelings. If you need a hug, a listening ear, or just someone to sit with you in the stillness, I’m here. But I won’t let you stay in that place too long. We have work to do.
I love you.
You matter.
You belong.
Together, we rise, move forward, to create a better, kinder, more accepting world.

Peace,
#tutulady
#forwardisapace

59

Kristine Binder

Today is my birthday, and as I celebrate another trip around the sun, I’ve been reflecting on the countless lessons life has taught me. From the deepest heartaches to the most glittery triumphs, here are 60 lessons I’ve learned so far – with a few bonus ones sprinkled in because, well, why not? Life is too short not to add a little extra sparkle.

59 Life Lessons I’ve Learned:

  1. Love isn’t always simple, but it’s always worth it.
  2. Grief doesn’t go away; it transforms. You learn to weave it into the fabric of your life.
  3. A wagging tail can remind you that joy often comes in the simplest moments and that love is unconditional.
  4. Kindness is the quietest revolution, but the most powerful one.
  5. Pink isn’t just a color; it’s an attitude.
  6. You can’t pour from an empty cup, so fill it with what fuels your soul.
  7. Glitter isn’t just an accessory; it’s a way of life.
  8. The best ideas often begin with a whisper of possibility.
  9. Showing up for the people you love is the ultimate act of courage.
  10. Life’s too short not to create your own moments of magic.
  11. Outgrowing things doesn’t mean failure; it’s a sign of growth.
  12. The art of saying no is the art of protecting your peace.
  13. Often, a hug speaks volumes and no words are needed.
  14. Dancing in the kitchen is sometimes better than a  grand celebration.
  15. Losing someone reshapes you, but their love stays alive in your heart forever.
  16. There’s nothing quite like getting lost in the pages of a good book.
  17. Keep showing up. Consistency is underrated but transformative.
  18. Sunrises are whispers from the universe, reminding you to begin again.
  19. Hope isn’t just a mindset; it’s a daily practice.
  20. Lead with joy. It’s infectious in the best way.
  21. The mirror reflects your only competition. Be better than you were yesterday.
  22. A great joke or a belly laugh can feel like a tiny miracle.
  23. Sometimes, the best therapy is a run (or walk) in fresh air.
  24. Heartbreak is life’s way of reshaping your heart for something bigger.
  25. Gratitude makes even the smallest moments bigger.
  26. Helping others lights a fire within you.
  27. Tears can be soul-cleansing.
  28. Growth often comes from the messiest chapters of life.
  29. Fear isn’t an enemy; it’s an indicator of something worth pursuing.
  30. Music has the power to mend what words cannot.
  31. Advocating for what’s right is rarely easy, but it’s always worthwhile.
  32. Celebrate the small victories; they’re the foundation of success.
  33. A hot cup of tea can soothe both body and soul.
  34. Hard days will come, but so will better ones. Hold on.
  35. Community is the backbone of a life well-lived. Find yours.
  36. A tutu isn’t just an outfit; it’s an unapologetic declaration of joy.
  37. Magic is hidden in the smallest, quietest moments. Seek it out.
  38. You can’t fix everything, but you can always show up.
  39. Forgiveness and making amends liberates you more than anyone else.
  40. A handwritten note can change someone’s day. Write them often.
  41. Being present is the greatest gift you can offer.
  42. Leap before you’re ready; trust the net will appear.
  43. Listen with your whole heart; it’s the key to connection.
  44. Reinvention isn’t a luxury; it’s a necessity.
  45. Love and loss are intertwined. Embrace both.
  46. Rewrite your story as often as you need to. You hold the pen.
  47. A candlelit evening at home can be as magical as a night out.
  48. Sometimes, the best journeys are the ones you take with music as your only guide.
  49. The most meaningful work often happens in silence.
  50. Let people know they matter; never leave it unsaid.
  51. Love…just love. Let love lead. 
  52. A touch of glitter makes everything feel more festive.
  53. Surround yourself with those who fan your flames, not extinguish them.
  54. Life’s messy, beautiful, and worth every second.
  55. There’s a unique magic in the rhythm of waves; spending time near the water soothes the mind, heals the soul, and reminds us of life’s endless ebb and flow.
  56. The most extraordinary moments are often wrapped in ordinary days.
  57. Joy is an act of rebellion. Choose it every day.
  58. Resume virtues may build a career, but eulogy virtues—kindness, integrity, love, and generosity—are what truly create a meaningful and unforgettable life.
  59. Love is love is love is love is love, infinite and transformative; it has the power to heal, uplift, empower, inspire, and remind us of the beauty and light within us all.

    Here’s to another year of learning, loving, and living life with all the sparkle, grief, laughter, and tutus it has to offer. Thanks for being part of my journey. Now, let’s celebrate!

    Peace,
    #tutulady
    #forwardisapace

Button

Kristine Binder

“Do you really give hugs?”
“Of course I do!”
That’s how it all started.

Recently I was at the Bath & Body Works register with my kids when the associate behind the counter had spotted my Free Mom Hugs button and couldn’t resist asking. They started to reach across the counter, but that is not  my style. Nope, I walked right around that counter and gave them a full, big ol’ mom hug—the kind that says, “You’re safe, you’re seen, and you’re loved.” When we pulled away, the associate looked at me with this huge smile and said, “I knew you were a real one! You just made my whole weekend better!” I couldn’t help but smile back and say, “I’m so glad.” We paid for our things and left the store, but that moment stayed with me. My kids? They know I’m an ally through and through. I wear my Free Mom Hugs button proudly, and they’ve seen it in action before. Of course, they tease me—it’s part of the package when you’re a parent—but deep down, they know they’re lucky and blessed to have an affirming adult in their lives. Not everyone has that. They’ve come to understand that for many people, especially in the LGBTQ+ community, having someone who sees and accepts them fully can make all the difference. This time, though, I could tell it hit differently for them. Watching me step around that counter, hug a stranger, and make their day better wasn’t just a “mom thing” anymore—it was something deeper. It showed them the real impact of being there for people, even in the smallest, most unexpected moments.
And with National Coming Out Day today, I can’t think of a better reminder. It’s moments like these that remind me why visibility and affirmation are so important. We all want to feel like we belong, to feel supported and accepted for who we are. For some, it’s as simple as a hug. For others, it’s knowing someone stands with them as they step into their truth.

Peace #tutulady #forwardisapace

Choose

Kristine Binder

Every morning, I take a walk. Sometimes it’s with my dog, but yesterday, it was just me. It was warm out as I rounded the corner to head back home. I noticed a young man who seemed a bit overwhelmed.
As I crossed the street and got closer, I asked if he needed any help, assuring him that I wasn’t trying to be creepy, just helpful. He looked at me and started to tear up. I felt horrible and quickly said, “Oh my goodness, I’m so sorry. Are you okay?” He explained that he was having a rough morning because he was starting a new job and was extremely nervous. Tears fell as he tried to wipe the sweat off his face. I pulled a napkin out of my pocket and helped him, since his hands were full.
I then asked where he was headed and if he’d like some company on the rest of his walk, since I was headed home. He said yes, and we walked and talked. He shared his worries about the new job and some personal stories. I listened and empathized.
When we arrived at the entrance to his new workplace, I wished him good luck and we said our goodbyes. As I walked the rest of the way home, I was filled with so many emotions.
There are no coincidences, only God incidents. We are put where we are needed; we just need to be aware. We never know what people are going through, and sometimes a simple act of kindness can make a life-changing difference.
Choose Kindness.
Choose Love.
Peace.
#tutulady
#forwardisapace