“Truth –
Fully present. Calm, balanced, at peace. Living my truth. A declaration of self — my soul’s freedom. Embracing who I am and what I stand for. Aware of my faults and loving myself anyway. I am content. This is me. I accept it and that’s what matters.”
– Fellow Flowers Blue Flower

I signed up for a virtual race and chose Team Truth because ….
5 years ago I made a life altering decision.  After being married for over 20 years, I made the choice to leave my abusive marriage and filed for divorce. I made a choice so that my son could live his truth. I made a choice so that my children and I would know freedom.  I have spent every day since,  sharing my story and helping others in similar situations so that they too can experience freedom and live their own truth.So, as my son would say, here’s the “Tea”….I missed the race on Saturday.
I signed up before I knew when graduation would be held and as luck would have it….my baby boy’s high school graduation was on race day. He is the last of my 5 to graduate so….the race was put on hold. Sunday it was hot as blazes and I found a million excuses. My adult kids had spent the night and I was not ready to leave “mom mode” for a run.When I originally registered for the 10K, I was not sure about the distance. See….I have not really run since January.
Why? Well, I wanted to celebrate my birthday, planning to run 5.5 to celebrate 55. I was about a 1/2 mile from my house when my pup and I were chased by an off leash dog. I turned, looked back, missed a curb and face planted …..on my arm which snapped like a frozen twig in the cold winter air. I drove myself to the hospital (much to the shock of the ER staff) only to find out that I had a colles fracture. Closed reduction, surgery, hours of OT and here I am.  What a great way to celebrate turning 55!
Since then, I walk over 10,000 steps per day with my dog but have not really tried to run. 
This morning I went to OT before school. Today was my first and last day teaching from home since March so I had a little time! My therapist asked if I was running yet and I told her I was a little apprehensive. She is a runner too…..”it’s time…” she said.
So, during my lunch hour  I decided to put on my MTM tank, tutu, flower and try for 3 miles. Yes, I was running around my neighborhood in a tutu! Full disclosure, I tucked the medal into my pocket fully planning to take a photo and celebrate just running a 5K. 
Well, I was feeling a little like Forrest Gump,  so I kept going!  
6.2 later…..I was done!
It was not fast.
It was not pretty.
There was walking.
There was crying.
There was cussing.
There were flowers (and my blue flower got lost!)There was another big dog (this time behind a fence)
There was a nervous pup that kept looking back to make sure Momma was ok.
There was a point at which a choice was made….go big or go home.
There was a text to my BRF at mile 5 asking for a kick in the a$$.There was a response “You can do anything for 14 minutes”
There was a friend who drove by at mile 5.5 honking, hollering and playing loud music! (Totally fate!)
There was the perfect song at the perfect time from the playlist when I needed a reminder that I am a fierce badass.
There was an eight year old pup pulling me the last few blocks (because he wanted his ball!)
There was a shade tree to collapse under and take a photo. 
There were a lot of signs that told me that this was the run I was supposed to have today.
I needed this run for so many reasons. 
I stopped caring about my finish time a years ago. 
Time is numbers on a clock. 
I am content.
I accept myself, my life and live my truth.
That’s what matters.
I was Made to Move. 
Forward is MY Pace. 


I took a walk today with 4 of my favorite guys (Puccini, Brubeck, Copelend, and Lucky dog). While I wish I could say we ran 6 miles, today we only walked it. I am still a bit anxious about running and falling again after my injury so we take it one step at a time. Today we walked.
While we were out, we saw a few of our lady friends. We have not seen them in a while due to weather and ….well….Covid!
“Still got his ball I see!” one of the ladies says.
“Goes no where without it!” I reply
Lucky? He was ready to flirt and show off for the ladies so I tossed the ball a few times as the ladies clapped and giggled then Lucky and I were on our way.
I had not realized how I missed something as small as that short interaction with the ladies. I had not realized I missed actually see them on our walks. I had not realized that they were all back outside walking together. And at that moment I DID realize that they…we …. had made it through a long winter.
Spring is a time of hope. It is a time when the weather starts to warm, the flowers start to bloom and the days get a little longer. It is a reminder that no season lasts forever. We all got through seasons in life with some seasons lasting longer than others but the seasons do change eventually.
I took a walk today with a few guys and met a few ladies. I took a walk today and felt something I have not felt in a long time……hope.


Day 9 of 30
By April my depression and anxiety were really horrible. So over spring break I decided to get back to running. On days I didn’t run, I walked. I set a daily goal of 10,000 steps each day. For  29 weeks(203 days/4.5 daily miles/920 miles), I have reached that goal. Some days even getting out of bed to get the final steps in and other days going well over that mark. 
I am grateful for my buddy and the time we spend together clearing my head. I’m grateful for my Garmin that rewards me when I reach my daily goal!! 


Day 6 of 30
City parks. City benches. These spaces are a gift to the residents of the city. Today the parks were full. Kids playing catch, socially distanced groups of ladies chatting, seniors sitting on the benches watching people go by, dogs playing fetch….it was such a sweet sight. Parks are a space that are often forgotten while we are rushing to get it all done or get from one place to another. Today I was reminded of a simpler time and for that I am grateful.


After school today, I headed out for my run. It was overcast and I was hoping to beat the rain. About a half mile from home, it started to sprinkle a bit. I turned to head home and stepped right into a puddle! While I was busy cursing my stupidity, I felt my other foot get wet….yup stepped in another puddle. The curse words were flowing ….I can string them together better than any sailor! Then I just started to laugh…..I could not get any more wet (ok, I could and did) but at this point, it was not really raining hard…just an annoying cold, raw drizzle so I started to walk. I pulled out my phone and changed my playlist. I switched from my running playlist to a playlist of classical female composers (listen here) and started walking. I needed to slow it down.
As I walked, I started to look around. I realized that the streets were empty and quiet. The rain had chased everyone indoors. I could smell fireplaces burning, dinners cooking, wet leaves and the rain. I could hear the raindrops hitting my jacket. I watched my happy, muddy, wet dog proudly carry his ball.
I live for a run on a cool, crisp, sunny fall day. It is one of my favorite things in the world. But running (or walking) in the rain on a cold raw fall day has its own endearing qualities. The colors of the fall trees against grey skies seem to be so much more rich and vibrant. The freedom of not having to avoid other people. The peace of being alone with your thoughts. I love it all!
As I walked, I thought about how a simple shift in mindset can change so much. I started off wet and cold and wanted to head home. But I ‘turned that frown upside down.’ Not in a “Pollyanna” way but in a real world “It can’t get anymore wet” way. I chose to make the best of the situation.
Take the opportunity to change your perspective. See the upside. Find the silver lining. Life is not always good but there is good in every day.